monday afternoon… finding that illusive sweet spot…

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Happy Bank Holiday Monday everyone! How are you?

I was working this morning, but the miserable weather here in Pennine Lancashire scuppered out plans a bit, so now I’m back in my flat with the afternoon all to myself!

If you read my post on Friday, you’ll know I have a lot cluttering up my head space at the moment. In fact just thinking about how much clutter there is has been taking up enough space in itself.

Here’s the thing, it is in my nature to always be looking forwards, and while sometimes (times like this) this can lead me to sleepless nights and general stress heady ways, most of the time this is what pushes me to be the best version of myself. However when those times come along when I can only look forward and see no clear path, that’s when I loose sight not only of the fact that I want to move forward but also of what is happening right in front of me.

At the beginning of this year I had hit some form of a sweet spot. Having started to read more into mindfulness, and not having any imminent plans that needed to be made, for the first time ever I felt still. Not stalled, but still and calm and happy. Unfortunately, as we’ve crept further on into this year, the luxury of having no imminent plans to be made has disappeared. The stuff that is taking up room in my head, about the future, needs to have that room dedicated to it. I HAVE to think about possible new jobs and back up plans. If I don’t I will find myself in a much worse position in 6 months time, that the slightly stressed out one I’m in at the moment, and besides, I LIKE to look forward.

However, the balance has tipped too far one way. I’m so far into looking forward that not only can I not see the path between here and there (something only adding to the stress) but I also can’t really enjoy right now, or give it the attention it deserves.

I need to find a new sweet spot. A spot somewhere in between, looking to the future while also taking in where I am right now. After all, if I don’t have a solid footing where I am right now, how can I be sure that the path going forward can take the weight of me and my plans?

This weekend I have been making tiny adjustments in an attempt to slither my way back along the scales to a point of equilibrium. Things like tidying up my kitchen table and turning it into a little bit of a creative workspace rather than just somehwere to store the dirty washing up. Taking a look at this blog and remembering that spending some dedicated time here worked wonders in helping me get out of waitressing and stay motivated. Taking out my notebook and planning not only what I want my life to look like in 3 years, but also in 3 months, and in 3 weeks time. And then switching off all together, finally finishing off some of my ‘to sew’ projects, and going out for dinner and enjoying the company, and a good conversation not only about work and the big stuff, but boys and clothes, and new cafes too.

In many ways this post is a bit of an immalgimation of all the posts I’ve published in the past couple of weeks, as my brain has hopped from one topic or worry to the next. Hopefully it is now all coming together.

And now, after a morning of work, planning and blogging, I’m heading to late lunch with a friend. Because that’s what bank holidays are for, and I’m already feeling much more balanced for it.

Live life & find your own sweet spot x

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morning monday… finding your base line…

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Morning everyone! How was your weekend? Mine was exceptionally quiet. After weeks of gallivanting it was really nice to spend some time back in my wee flat tidying up, and going no further than town which is all of ten minutes down the road!

Quiet alone time, also gives you plenty of time to think.

As I mentioned on Saturday, going home and spending some time coffee hopping , reminded me of all the hours I would spend just me, my notebook and my plans. Back then I had not only a fair amount of time to spend to myself, something which I never really appreciated, but I had a fair bit to plan. I wanted to change my life.

That’s how these Monday morning posts came about, and it is really how this blog came to life. Obviously all that planning paid off, and I am in no way saying that I would trade where I am now for then, but…

But ever since moving I’ve missed that part of me. The part that planned out her week in her notebook. That spent those hours in between shifts searching for the next opportunity, scribbling down blog ideas and getting all those thousands of ideas out of her head and onto screen and paper.

Of course this blog has kept going, and my notebook still gets dusted off more regularly than most, but those hours haven’t been a set feature in my life. They’ve been a happy accident.

Yesterday I stole myself away to a cafe, with my notebook and my tablet and a set of coloured fine liners and for three hours (the same amount of time I used to get between the lunch and dinner shifts at work) I sat and stared out at space, journalled, googled, mind mapped and swapped the google calendar I’d been living my life by for a paper one. With the dates handwritten across two notebook pages.

I’ve come to realise that this is my base line. That this is the foundation for everything else and the reason why, even though I’ve achieved some amazing things in the year since I left that old life, the reason that I’ve dipped up and down so high, so low, and so regularly, is because I let this base line disappear.

I don’t need to spend 3 hours every day living in a colour coded notebook but I do need to put time aside each week to make sure that I have the foundation laid for everything else I hope to do that week.

So here is to realising you need a solid base line, to getting back to basics and becoming the best version of yourself, however that may look for you.

Live life & lay good foundations x

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morning may… thinking consciously…

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porridge topped with fresh strawberries, cocconut milk, vanilla extract and sunflower seeds

Morning everyone! How are you did you enjoy the long weekend? It feels a little late to be posting, not only my usual Monday post on a Tuesday, but my monthly goals post 5 days into May, but shall we all just agree… Bank holidays don’t count right?

Last month I decided to give up setting 3 specific goals for the month, and instead just pay attention to everything I was already achieving. I was pretty happy with the results of this, as I mentioned on Friday, it was great not pile on any extra pressure but at the same time feel like I was getting things done, I want to carry on with that idea this month, but with a little more structure.

I’m adopting a monthly mantra for May, and not just because I like the alliteration. Something I’ve always felt about myself is that while I’ve always managed to get by ok, acting on a whim, if I spent a little bit more time thinking over my decisions, I would probably reap the benefits. So this month I am going to be think consciously.

Every decision I’m make I’m going to mull over a little first and do things with intention. Both big and little, everything from what I’m eating, how I spend my money and what I do with my time. I’m not telling myself ‘don’t do that’ or ‘do do that’ I’m just saying to think it through first.

So many times I find myself eating stuff I didn’t really want, buying clothes just for the sake of it, and spending evenings in front of netflix, all because I didn’t put any thought into it. Yes, sometimes it’s great to just switch off, but other times, it’s better to really be aware of what you’re doing. I’m hoping this month I will get back to my very best eating habits, get a bit more reconnected with this little space, and prove to myself that I still know how to budget, amongst other things.

And after a long weekend of pure indulgence, I can hardly feel like I’m denying myself anything can I?

Live life & put a little thought into it x